6th October – fact of the day

The Spanish Society for the Study of Filo-Parental Violence (Sociedad Española para el Estudio de la Violencia Filio-Parental; SEVIFIP) was established in 2013.

SEVIFIP assembled an 11-person expert panel, reviewed existing definitions, analysed them and developed a definition intended to be precise and useful for both research and intervention.

Since then, SEVIFIP has established Spain as a global leader in filial violence research and practice. They organise regular national conferences and developed an Observatory of VFP, publications, research activity, training and a resource map. Its current website describes a community through which professionals can exchange knowledge and access research, publications and developments in the field. SEVIFIP – Sociedad Española para el Estudio de la Violencia Filio-Parental

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5th October – fact of the day

The Home Office didn’t launch a consultation on a formal definition for CPV until 2023, and this has been delayed due to two separate changes in Government.

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4th October – fact of the day

The European Commission funded Responding to Child to Parent Violence (RCPV) project ran from 2013-2015 across Spain, England, Ireland, Sweden and Bulgaria. It has been described as the first cross-European collaborative response to CPV

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3rd October – fact of the day

My Violent Child, a British documentary series about child to parent violence is the first UK-based documentary on this topic and was broadcast on Channel 5 on 18 June 2014.

A follow-up, Tearing Us Apart was shown in March 2015

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2nd October – fact of the day

Today’s fact for our 31 facts of October –

Holes in Wall was launched by Helen Bonnick in 2011 and it has since become the leading international knowledge hub for child and adolescent to parent violence and abuse. We bring together research, practice, resources and lived experience from the UK and around the world.”

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Child to parent violence awareness…

In honour of child-to-parent awareness day on the 14th of October, we at Holes have come up with one fact per day to share. 31 facts for October.

Today, on the 1st of October

Fact one: The phenomenon was first formally described as “Battered Parent Syndrome” by Harbin and Madden in 1979, decades before terms such as CPV, CPA, APVA, CAPVA or CPVA became common, but well after psychiatric researchers were talking about relevant family referrals into their clinics. “Battered Parent Syndrome” is still referenced in much contemporary research.

Do you have any surprising or important facts you think we should mention?

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Dads’ stories

At the Reframing Profession Practice conference, we heard from Al Coates. Al’s own work, research, and lived experience of child-to-parent abuse brought to the fore some of the challenges facing dads in particular.

Living with a child with complex needs and behaviour that reflects that struggle can be challenging. That’s polite and palatable language for what is often messy, difficult and scary behaviour, aggression, shouting, threats, hitting, property destruction to name a few manifestations. 

Thankfully there’s a growing understanding of the behaviour that many families’ experience. Far from being a simply monolithic behaviour or a lazy stereotype the manifestation of this challenging behaviour can be complex and nuanced. One of the most refreshing aspects of the CPA Reframing Professional Practice conference was the opportunity to look closer at areas within this sphere and to that end I was asked to speak to my personal experience as an adoptive dad as well as to the direct work I do with adoptive dads living with children’s whose behaviour can be aggressive and violent. 

Broadly dads remain in a small minority in terms of primary carers for children and within my experience that includes adoptive parents. Mums do the heavy lifting and we know that when we look at children’s negative behaviour it is predominantly, though not exclusively, directed at mums.

That’s not the focus of this post but it’s important to understand the broader contexts. Dads do often witness violence and aggression as well as being victims of it. Simple biology means that dads may not feel as physically vulnerable when behaviour manifests. That may be simple biology but it also may reflect mens experience of violence or the lack of it in their lives. But witnessing people you love and care for being hurt or living in an environment can be just as challenging. Impacts on mental and physical health with nervous systems set to alert constantly. 

Many models of support are built by women and for women and that is wholly right but there also need to be a place for dads to talk plainly and directly to their experience. But as one dad said to me ‘when I’m in a group with my wife and she’s talking I just stay quiet, I see things differently but in a room full of women that’s not the place I can share my experience’. 

That’s not to blame women but it is perhaps an indicator of why men are less present in those spaces. There are other reasons, generally men express themselves in different ways and, as said, have different experiences. 

At the conference I was given the opportunity to unpack all of the above and more. I spoke of the rawness of the peer conversations and the challenges of breaking down taboos and the isolation that dads feel. 

The challenges that parents face are often universal, stigma, shame, isolation and stress to name the obvious. How parents and carers experience these challenges is influenced by a myriad of factors but it’s clear that we need to create spaces where everyone can not only share but to look around the room and listen to experiences and voices that reflect our own.  

Al now runs an online support service, alongside Beacon Services, for adoptive Dads living with child-to-parent abuse. You can find out more here: Dads Support Group – West Midlands and UK

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Conference reflections

As we are coming to the end of our conference theme, I have a few reflections on the importance of practitioner focused events which manage to centralise lived experience; very much what was achieved at the Reframing Professional Practice conference. This event brought together perspectives that are too often kept apart: those of practitioners, researchers and people with lived experience. As I was able to support Maria in organising the conference, I was already familiar with the arguments being presented. What was significant was seeing these different forms of knowledge placed alongside one another, in an almost chronological fashion, and recognising the possibilities that creates when viewing child to parent abuse across the life course.

Practitioner knowledge is often described as anecdotal or experiential, as though it sits below academic evidence. Yet practitioners work within the realities of complex systems every day. They understand what policies look like when translated into practice, where professional assumptions break down and what is possible within the constraints of real services. Lived experience offers a similarly important challenge to professional certainty. It shifts attention from what services intend to do to what it is actually like to encounter them. When these perspectives are taken seriously, they can expose gaps that professional or academic accounts alone may miss.

For a reader who was not at the conference, this is perhaps its central message: professional practice is not produced by one type of expertise. It is shaped through the interaction of evidence, professional knowledge and lived experience. Reframing practice means recognising that each can change how we understand the problem… and what we decide to do about it.

Coming up in October, we will have several more events:

PEGS

PEGS will once again be hosting an event of Child-to-Parent Abuse Awareness Day (October 14th), moving from their international conference format, to what they are referring to as the Child to Parent Abuse Summit 2026. If you are wondering what the difference between a summit and conference is, here is a basic description:

  • A conference brings together interested parties, individuals and organisations, to engage in knowledge exchange, debate, and discussion about a topic of interest.
  • A summit is a specialised and high-level meeting. It usually brings together senior leaders, experts, government officials, or important decision-makers to discuss major issues and reach agreements on important decisions.

Summits are often smaller and more focused than conferences, and the line up has not completely been announced but PEGS have previously given us some excellent online conferences, so the national summit is expected to be a good place to see the start of some important structural change. You can book here: Child to Parent Abuse Summit 2026 | PEGS | PEGS

International CPV Network

I (Nikki) am heading to Spain to share work on the UK context for the Professional Conference on Child-to-Parent Violence: “Acting Early: Prevention and Intervention in CPV,“ which will be held on 22 October 2026 at Universidad Loyola. This is an exciting opportunity to look at the international context of CPV in Spain, which produces more than half the global research on CPV. You can book your place here: https://eventos.uloyola.es/153750/detail/jornada-profesional-en-violencia-filio-parental.html

At this conference, the international practitioner-research network on CPV is being launched, which is a great opportunity for collaboration, as well as ensuring the research being conducted is relevant to practitioners who are doing the direct work with families.

If you are aware of any other events, do let us know. We will soon be moving onto a new theme about many publications in this area!

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Reframing Child to Parent Abuse: What Black Mothers’ Experiences Reveal

By Dr Anu Adebogun

Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) remains one of the most stigmatised and least understood forms of family harm. There is little empirical exploration of how this hidden harm is perceived, experienced and navigated within families of diverse ethnic, racial and cultural backgrounds. My PhD research, completed at the University of Oxford, empirically documented for the first time the lived experiences of Black (African and Caribbean) mothers affected by this harm. My study drew on conversations, surveys and focus groups with 19 African and Caribbean mothers, alongside interviews with 26 professionals across social care, youth justice, education and mental health. What emerges are pertinent realities around how race, gender, culture and religion not only shape harm but also dictate Black maternal coping mechanisms and help-seeking efforts, often resulting in a deliberate avoidance of services.

Cultural Scripts and the Hiding of Harm

At the Reframing Professional Practice conference, I noted that the overrepresentation of mothers as victims of this harm is widely observed in research and theorised as resulting from the sexism and gender inequality that perpetuates the acceptable control, dominance and subordination of women. In the experience of Black women, however, gender power dynamics are but one structural force shaping the social constitution of their motherhood. Their motherhood is racialised, classed, surveilled and culturally scripted, and that intersection is precisely what keeps CPA hidden.

A central part of my presentation outlined one of six cultural scripts (narratives and expectations) shaping Black maternal identity and its implications for how CPA is experienced. One illustrative example was the script of “Matriarchal Providers”, which centres labour and provision in the carework of Black mothers. This encapsulates mothering across borders, including cultural financial obligations to support extended families in countries of origin, colloquially described as “Black tax”. I explored how this cultural script coincides with CPA through the infliction of financial harm on mothers: depletion of resources, theft of credit cards, and unauthorised purchases. An act justified by one young person on the grounds of entitlement. Without understanding what economic provision means within Black maternal identity, financial obligation rooted in intergenerational duty and collective survival can be reframed as entitlement, rather than exploitation, by both mother and child.

Racialisation of Maternal Blame

Shame, silence and stigma operate both within communities and within services. The cultural scripts shaping Black motherhood collide with a double bind, where they can be blamed within their own communities for disciplining too firmly or softly by failing the ideal of maternal strength. In some religious circles, for failing to pray, fast, or practise spiritual devotion sufficiently. 

Within services, Black mothers experience judgment and a characterisation of their mothering as deviant when measured against White, middle-class standards of “intensive mothering”. These standards problematise single motherhood, matriarchal providership or authoritative mothering as risk factors or triggers for CPA. The simultaneous veneration and weaponisation of strength is salient here: tropes used to characterise Black womanhood render a Black mother’s vulnerability, victimhood and need for protection structurally inconceivable.

Rethinking Engagement

A theme anchoring the experiences of Black mothers is the tripartite burden they carry as mother, victim and advocate, often in direct conflict. Disclosure or (dis)engagement with services is rarely a simple calculation of “will this help?” Rather, it involves weighing whether engagement will confirm racist stereotypes of Black children as aggressive or dangerous, invite criminalisation, or cost the family more than it gives. The mothers in my study were largely first-generation migrants, often uncertain whether Western systems would recognise CPA as harmful, or whether services perceived to “other” African and Caribbean mothering would instead pathologise her motherhood as deficient.

Recommendations for Practice

Adopting culturally responsive practice and representation within services is not simply about who sits across the table. It is about whether the frameworks, language and assumptions guiding that conversation were designed with Black maternal realities in mind. This means auditing risk tools for racialised assumptions, training practitioners in the cultural scripts shaping disclosure, and holding a mother’s tripartite role in mind at every first contact.

It also means recognising and engaging the informal support pathways through which Black African and Caribbean mothers seek solidarity and collective care. Having lost the literal and symbolic “village” of extended family through migration, the mothers I spoke with built makeshift ones instead: sister circles, community mothers and elders.

Services must not pathologise these stakeholders but actively strengthen these connections, resource these avenues of support, and co-design interventions to better reach Black families in need. Nor should services misrepresent reliance on this informal protective architecture as unwillingness to engage. Rather, adopting non-judgmental attitudes and professional curiosity, practitioners must acknowledge the pre-eminence of faith and spirituality to some Black mothers, recognising that community groups and faith leaders are often first responders and providers of informal support.

This was a particularly inspiring session within the Reframing Professional Practice conference; Anu creatively crafted the narratives of Black mothers into a presentation which was highly relevant to the practitioners in the room. Not only being culturally competent but culturally responsive and open to not only what parental narratives are, but also what might be underpinning these narratives. Black mothers experience so many compounding challenges in their navigation of service intrusion, into their lives, informal supporters often act as a necessary lifeline.

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‘Merseyside Domestic Violence Service Reopens its CAPVA referrals: From Conference Rooms to Family Homes

We are now at the mid-way point of our conference theme, and it seemed a nice time to bring together reflections on two conference events focusing upon CAPVA/CPA. Here, Chloe Booth, PhD student and CAPVA practitioner, reflects upon these events

Child and adolescent to parent violence and abuse (CAPVA) continues to sit in an uncomfortable and often overlooked space within both research and practice. Despite growing recognition, many families still experience shame, isolation, and misunderstanding when seeking support, if they even know where to look. As both a Child and Young Person (CYP) practitioner and CAPVA specialist at Merseyside Domestic Violence Service and PhD researcher with Liverpool John Moores University, I find myself constantly moving between academic discussion and the realities families face every day, allowing me a unique multi-facetted insight into the issue. 

Attending the Merseyside CAPVA Conference: Evidence, Practice and Partnership in Liverpool and the Silenced: Reframing Professional Practice in the Child to Parent Abuse arena conference in London so far this year reinforced just how important those connections are. What stayed with me most was not simply the presentation of new research or experience, but the recurring message that children, parents/carers, and practitioners are still navigating systems that struggle to fully understand CAPVA in all its complexity. Across both conferences, I was struck by the emphasis on listening from the perspectives of each individual family, particularly to the voices that are often excluded from policy, research, and intervention design. Discussions around trauma, stigma, neurodiversity, and family relationships highlighted how easily CAPVA can become reduced to “challenging behaviour” or “poor parenting” by uneducated professionals, rather than understood within broader relational and social contexts.

As a researcher, these conversations challenged me to think more critically about what meaningful CAPVA research should look like moving forward, and how this should implement policy and practice. I left reflecting on whose voices are prioritised, how research findings translate into frontline support, and how we avoid creating further silencing for families already carrying significant shame and fear. This is particularly relevant within my work in Liverpool at Merseyside Domestic Violence Service, where I support children and families experiencing CAPVA directly. In practice, no two families look the same, the lived realities behind CAPVA are incredibly complex, and often deeply misunderstood. The themes explored at both conferences mirrored many of the conversations happening in frontline work, with parents/carers feeling blamed, young people struggling to regulate overwhelming emotions, and professionals trying to respond without adequate frameworks or resources. It is time for a clear definition, an understanding of where CAPVA sits within policy, and structured referral and support pathways for all professionals responding to CAPVA. 

At Merseyside Domestic Violence Service, we are incredibly pleased to say that we have recently been awarded the funding to reopen our referrals for families experiencing CAPVA in Merseyside. Whether you are a professional working with families, or experiencing the issue yourself, please follow the link below to submit a referral, or simply get in touch for some advice, and we will be in contact to discuss support. 

The CAPVA (Child and Adolescent to Parent Violence and Abuse) – Merseyside Domestic Violence Service [MDVS] 0151 709 8770  

Chloe Booth

Thank you to Chloe. What we particularly liked about this piece was how well she outlines the importance to be critical in our approach to working with families. No two families are the same, their context, histories, and differences mean the way they engage with services, and the needs of the children and parents requires nuance and sensitivity.

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