Tag Archives: child to parent violence and abuse

CPV: The podcast special

How do you consume your podcasts?

On the way to work on the train? Walking the dog? While you’re doing the ironing? Or do you find a quiet half hour to focus solely on the content? However you find the time, there are some great podcasts out the at the moment, focussing either specifically on children using harmful behaviour towards parents – CPV – or on different approaches to working with families to bring about a more healthy and hopeful life. These may be directed first and foremost towards professionals – offering guidance for work with families, or they may offer tips and strategies directly to those affected. Whatever you are looking for, they all remind us that this is something that is more prevalent than we might have imagined previously, but that there is hope when you find the right people who know their stuff!

By no means a definitive list, but here is a selection of some of the top podcasts regarding CPV.

The Adoption and Fostering podcast is now in its 9th year, with nearly 200 episodes in the library. Al Coates and Scott Casson-Rennie discuss a range of issues related to contemporary adoption and fostering, often with special guests. Many of the episodes touch on children’s aggressive behaviour towards parents and carers. A fair number focus on this issue specifically. While this is labelled as adoption and fostering, many in other fields will find topics of relevance.

Capa First Response launched Series 1 of their podcasts in early 2024 and already have a second series ready to go. Series 1 features conversations between founder Jane Griffiths, Senior Practitioner Matt Rider, and patron Helen Bonnick, and touched on more general issues regarding child to parent violence and abuse which come up frequently in discussion, while the next episodes will address more specific topics such as neurodiversity. There is a third series in the planning stage.

The NVR podcast is aimed both at professionals and families, with experts in the field discussing strategies, the rationale behind this way of working, and case studies amongst other things. Non-Violent Resistance (NVR) has a proven track record for work with families who have experienced trauma, and looks at ways to de-escalate a situation and build a supportive network around the family. Peter Jakob, Shila Desai, Jill Lubienski and Rachael Aylmer chat together and bring in special guests. The applications are broad, but again, many will touch on families where children are using violence and aggression, or where there are similar overlapping issues.

Sarah Fisher is an NVR practitioner who developed Connective Family, a practice supporting families where children are exhibiting challenging behaviour. Her podcasts are often shorter than others but full of down to earth advice and quick tips for busy families.

Interwoven Connections is a Canadian Organisation supporting ‘the tapestry of families and relationships formed through adoption, kinship and customary care’, particularly where children are using harmful behaviours towards parents and carers. They have a library of resources for parents including webinars and podcasts.

There are of course many other resources as well as these listed. You will find some listed on the Sound and Vision page, but I would also invite comments if you have suggestions of other relevant podcasts which have been helpful to you and which you can recommend to others on this subject!

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CPA Awareness Day – nearly here!

Since 2022, PEGS have been marking International CPA Awareness Day in October. In a busy field of awareness days it was surely time we had our turn, and PEGS have worked hard to make it a meaningful event of awareness raising as well as celebration of achievement. This year the day falls on Monday 14th October and the team have put together a virtual conference of renowned international speakers, bringing together researchers, policy makers, decision makers, frontline professionals and campaigners.

It is the first time professionals from across the globe will gather together to share updates, policies, research and education, alongside the team at PEGS.

The speaker line up is impressive and this will certainly be an interesting all day event. You can find out more information about the day, as well as booking your place, via the PEGS website.

CPA (child to parent abuse) is the term preferred by PEGS, but they include within this umbrella all the many harms that parents experience, whatever you choose to call it.

There are many other conferences coming up over the next weeks and months which will be of interest to those working with families experiencing child to parent violence and abuse. Head over to the Events page for more information about these opportunities.

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The new Eastenders CPA storyline

It’s not the first time, of course, but that doesn’t stop the excitement when the issues surrounding child to parent violence and abuse (CPVA) are brought to greater public awareness through inclusion in a popular soap on TV or even the radio!

We’ve had Coronation Street in 2015, and Holby City in 2018 to name but two, and I was definitely convinced The Archers was touching on the issue when Jamie Perks started causing trouble around 2010; and now in 2024 we have an announcement that Eastenders will be featuring a storyline examining the relationship between Tommy Moon and Kat Slater over the course of the summer.

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Starting from Scratch

What would be the first thing to do if you were starting from scratch? 

Not the usual question I am asked. In the past it would have been “how much is there?”; more recently the enquirer would be asking for priorities from a list of recommendations. But I was meeting last week with Sarah Townsend, Principal Advisor to Te Puna Aonui, the New Zealand joint venture to improve the whole-of-government approach to family and sexual violence.

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Learning from the internet

We are only just coming to the end of January, but it has been interesting already to read a number of papers which have been published online this month. Two particularly attracted my attention: that from Harries, Curtis, Skvarc, Benstead, Walker and Mayshak, and also this one from Cortina and Holt – ‘This is what happens to people who don’t spank their kids’: An analysis of YouTube comments to news reports of child to parent violence.

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Welcome to 2024!

I wish all those reading this a peaceful and encouraging new year.

It is customary to hope for new and better things in the year ahead, but we know that for many families the passing of time seems to bring only a consolidation of their anxieties and pain. The holiday period can be especially stressful and so many people will be emerging bruised and battered – and not just emotionally. But there are reasons to be hopeful as we face the coming months and I would like to share some with you.

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Finding the right words: what I meant

We often think about the language we use in work with families where there is harmful behaviour from children, but more usually in terms of what we call it (see this sentence!) or the terms we use to describe the various family members involved. This week I have been reflecting on the difficulties that arise when the language we use as professionals is different to that used by parents. I have written about this before, and included a reference in my book to a blog by Raising Devon where the author talks about the difficulties in getting help while she referred to her child’s behaviour as “tantrums” rather than “rages”.

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Hear ME project published

Dhriti Suresh-Eapen and AVA are thrilled to publish the findings and recommendations from their Hear ME project today.

This one-year small scope project sought to centre the experiences of mothers experiencing violence and abuse from their adult children, and to start to fill a massive gap in understanding and policy recommendations. Over the course of many months, the research team heard from those on the frontline, both as parents and as practitioners, before formulating a series of proposals which are brought together in this report.

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Deprivation of Liberty stories

Summer is the time that I catch up on reading all the research papers and news articles that I have been storing on my laptop; and so I have finally found the space to pull some thoughts together. One thing that has particularly caught my eye over the last months has been the reporting on the rise in the number of vulnerable young people subject to Deprivation of Liberty (DoL) Orders.  

Children and Young People Now has run a number of articles about this, examining the reasons for the sharp rise in orders (here), and analysing the growing gap in secure care provision (here), and in this piece from the beginning of August, looking at the impact on the young people themselves, often placed at great distance from their families and support systems, in unsuitable accommodation and in situations likely to increase their trauma and vulnerability rather than aid their recovery. 

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Introducing a new CPVA Directory!

I started posting news about the project I was working on, with others, to map provision for families experiencing child to parent violence and abuse (CPVA) in 2014, with regular updates before finally launching the page on my website in October 2015. At that time we knew of maybe 30 specialist services dotted around the country, some already well established, and others already a little precarious in their funding stream. Since that time there has been an exciting slow but steady growth in provision as different agencies have got on board, speeding up most recently through the support of the Domestic Abuse Commissioner‘s work in raising the profile of CPVA.

Keeping the Directory up to date and relevant has been a mammoth task, and one which is now beyond my capabilities with the growth in services, and so I have been working with Respect for the last year to see how it might migrate onto a new platform. Respect have a long history of work with young people using violence and abuse in the home, and importantly they also already have a large database of services within the domestic abuse arena, and so I knew that this was an area of work that they had both the experience and capacity to maintain for the future. Over the last months, all members of the old directory were contacted and gave permission to move across and the new Directory was finally launched last week!

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