There are still places left for those wishing to attend the Alternative Restoratives awareness raising day, on Understanding and Working with Teenage Violence to Parents, on March 1st. The closing date for applications for the Wakefield event has been extended to February 10th. Full details of the event, and an application form can be found here.
Author Archives: helenbonnick
In Cold Blood: Parent abuse in Singapore
This powerful video from Singapore was posted in the week. Some viewers have already told me how distressing they found it.
Addresses are given at the end for those wishing to access advice and support.
Filed under TV and video
I don’t believe it!
We should feel encouraged that, increasingly, friends, colleagues, acquaintances are accepting of the fact that there are parents who face regular abuse from their own children; and understand that parents may suffer further humiliation at the hands of the authorities when they do report the abuse, and its cause is identified as a failure of proper parenting. But there are still some aspects of this phenomenon that seem a step too far, even for convinced supporters. I was in just such a conversation recently when I introduced the problem of parents actually being punished for their children’s behaviour. “I don’t believe it – show me the evidence” was the response. It is indeed hard to believe that we still live in a society that is so procedurally rigid that we cannot accommodate the situations that do not fit the standard template.
I would suggest that there are a number of different scenarios here. Continue reading
Filed under Discussion
The Respect Young People’s Toolkit
I met recently with Julia Worms, of the Respect Young People’s Service, to learn more about the Respect Young People’s Toolkit, which was officially launched in Britain last year, supporting work with young people using violence in close relationships.
Aside from work within criminal justice, Respect is unique in developing family violence interventions, setting standards for provision and operating as an umbrella membership organisation, as well as offering training and development. Its independence is important, allowing freedom to operate within the voluntary sector and to develop work such as the YP Toolkit. Continue reading
Filed under projects, Training opportunities
Parent Abuse Research Review
Another literature review came out in December 2011. The Social Ecology of Adolescent-Initiated Parent Abuse: A Review of the Literature, by Jun Sung Hong, Michael J. Kral, Dorothy L. Espelage and Paula Allen-Meares, is available on line. The abstract indicates that it focusses on context and risk factors, and suggests further avenues for research.
I plan in the near future to create a separate page here for links to articles as I become aware of them, and also a page dedicated to resources. Watch out for these exciting developments!
Filed under publications
A rock and a hard place
Writing a piece for PSW magazine over the holiday, and then watching the Archbishop of Canterbury’s new year’s day speech, has reminded me of the difficulties inherent in raising awareness of a serious issue – such as parent abuse – while avoiding demonising the various players. Much is made within the literature on child to parent violence, of taking care not to apportion blame, thereby increasing the shame parents already feel and making them less likely to seek help. Fundamental to the Respect agenda of the mid Labour years from 2006 was the notion of parental responsibility, and of holding parents to account for the behaviour of their children, credited with damaging further the precarious balance of power within some families. Continue reading
Filed under Discussion
Broadening the definition of domestic violence
The announcement yesterday by the government that there is to be a consultation on the definition of domestic violence, in England and Wales, is to be applauded, notwithstanding criticism that current policy contradicts this possibility of progress.
The consultation looks specifically at whether to include coercive control within the definition, recognising that this is a very real aspect of domestic abuse and can contribute itself to deaths; and whether to lower the age to 16 / 17, or remove the lower age limit completely. It is important to state here that the lowering of the age is intended to bring within the legislation abuse experienced by teenagers as victims, and comes as a response to reports by groups such as Respect, who have been campaigning hard on the issue of dating violence. Nevertheless, lowering the age would also seem to include the possibility of bringing parent abuse within the definition, a small step towards full recognition.
The arguments about the impact of this have been rehearsed before: the potential effects of criminalising young people, the need to back up law with services, the need to change attitudes as well as the law, as well as the question of whether domestic violence offers the most appropriate framework of understanding. Nevertheless, it remains the case that, for some parents calling the police is a matter of life and death and we should afford them the respect of being able to name the violence for what it is.
The consultation exercise runs till 30th March 2012.
Filed under Discussion
Family Lives 2011 report
Family Lives (formally Parentline Plus) released an update to their 2010 report: ‘When Family Life Hurts: Family Experience of Aggression in Children’ in November this year. They demonstrate an increase in calls to their helpline regarding children’s aggressive behaviour, and are greatly concerned that only 56% reported having sought help with this. Continue reading
Filed under publications
Teen violence to parents
Lynette Robinson, of Alternative Restoratives, has sent me a flyer for a one-day training course she is joint facilitating in the new year, March 1st 2012 in Wakefield, UK.
You can find details and booking form here.
Filed under Training opportunities
HOLES IN THE WALL 