An interesting juxtaposition of topics on Woman’s Hour today. Amongst the early items, Jenni Murray interviewed Lisa Harker, Head of Strategy at the NSPCC, and Radio 1 presenter, Gemma Cairney, about the shocking frequency of teenage relationship abuse. Gemma’s documentary “Bruising Silence” aired on Radio 1 tonight, and the NSPCC published a report, “Standing on my own two feet” in 2011, described as the first ever study of abusive relationships among teenagers (downloadable from the NSPCC website). Among the findings, from the University of Bristol, were that 25% of teenage girls and 18% of boys had experienced physical violence in a relationship. In a lot of cases, there was a strong association with witnessing violence in the home, or with peers or family members – 20% of girls had seen domestic violence. Continue reading
Category Archives: Discussion
For shame
There’s been a bit of a theme going on it seems lately about shame.
Today I have been re-reading Lynette Robinson’s Winston Churchill Memorial Trust Report, Interventions and Restorative Responses to Address Teen Violence Against Parents, and the accompanying comments by Terry O’Connell, Director of Real Justice (both available here) Lynette writes about the high level of shame experienced not just by the parents throughout their experiences, but also by the young people regarding their behaviour, and the difficulties of moving on from this position if we do not give people the tools to work with. Continue reading
Filed under Discussion
Respect 6th National Practitioners Seminar
I have come to anticipate a stimulating and informative experience from Respect’s Practitioner Seminars. Yesterday’s, in the London Borough of Haringey, was the 6th national conference, the first to be held in partnership with a local authority, and it certainly lived up to all expectations. Continue reading
Filed under Discussion, projects, Training opportunities
Safeguarding issues in child to parent violence
A lot has been written about the difficulties in adopting a safeguarding response to the issue of parent abuse. First of all, it falls outside the normative model of child as victim, to which the responses are generally geared; and the safeguarding of vulnerable adults guidance is not usually applied to the parents in these situations, as they are not considered vulnerable within the specific terms. Continue reading
Filed under Discussion, publications
Pointing the finger at “Troubled Families”
The media buzzes again today with discussion about help for Cameron’s 120,000 “troubled families”. (BBC article here)
The term itself has fallen into disrepute, not least since revelations regarding the integrity of the statistical base for the government’s claims. (Tim Harford’s excellent radio article here) However, we are in danger of focusing so much on the blatant disregard of facts that we forget that there are indeed many families in dire need of help, whether the 120,000 experiencing multiple disadvantage, or the families (quantity unknown) about whom Cameron was actually talking. There will, presumably, be some overlap, but the suggestion that being poor, unwell or disabled, and in substandard housing, automatically qualifies you as a “neighbour from hell” is deeply offensive. In a post today, Declan Gaffney suggests that the situation could be easily redeemed, and our attention refocused presumably, if government spokespeople would only admit to the flaws. Continue reading
Filed under Discussion, news reports
Amanda Holt speaking at Surrey University
An inspiring talk from Amanda Holt yesterday at Surrey University, based on her forthcoming book: Adolescent-to-Parent Abuse: Current Understandings in Research, Policy and Practice. The book, from Policy Press, due out in November this year, will be the first academic text on parent abuse to be published in Britain. Offering a thorough overview of the subject, Amanda first considered the similarities and differences with other forms of family violence; and then went on to examine what we can learn from the different types of data available. Continue reading
Filed under Discussion, publications
Should you call the cops on your kids?
Anderson Cooper used his CNN TV show on January 25th to discuss this question, with mothers experiencing abuse from their children who had done just that. Dr. Karen Binder-Brynes (described as a leading psychologist) offered her opinion, a police officer gave his side of the story, and of course the studio audience had their own questions and comments. The clips give a sense of the utter desperation of some parents, one of whom then found herself charged with child abuse as her daughter counter claimed against her. Anderson attempts to draw out the different emotions at play in these situations; and one of the parents breaks down as she details her frustration at the lack of response over considerable time when she called for help from social services. Continue reading
Filed under Discussion, TV and video
I don’t believe it!
We should feel encouraged that, increasingly, friends, colleagues, acquaintances are accepting of the fact that there are parents who face regular abuse from their own children; and understand that parents may suffer further humiliation at the hands of the authorities when they do report the abuse, and its cause is identified as a failure of proper parenting. But there are still some aspects of this phenomenon that seem a step too far, even for convinced supporters. I was in just such a conversation recently when I introduced the problem of parents actually being punished for their children’s behaviour. “I don’t believe it – show me the evidence” was the response. It is indeed hard to believe that we still live in a society that is so procedurally rigid that we cannot accommodate the situations that do not fit the standard template.
I would suggest that there are a number of different scenarios here. Continue reading
Filed under Discussion
A rock and a hard place
Writing a piece for PSW magazine over the holiday, and then watching the Archbishop of Canterbury’s new year’s day speech, has reminded me of the difficulties inherent in raising awareness of a serious issue – such as parent abuse – while avoiding demonising the various players. Much is made within the literature on child to parent violence, of taking care not to apportion blame, thereby increasing the shame parents already feel and making them less likely to seek help. Fundamental to the Respect agenda of the mid Labour years from 2006 was the notion of parental responsibility, and of holding parents to account for the behaviour of their children, credited with damaging further the precarious balance of power within some families. Continue reading
Filed under Discussion
Broadening the definition of domestic violence
The announcement yesterday by the government that there is to be a consultation on the definition of domestic violence, in England and Wales, is to be applauded, notwithstanding criticism that current policy contradicts this possibility of progress.
The consultation looks specifically at whether to include coercive control within the definition, recognising that this is a very real aspect of domestic abuse and can contribute itself to deaths; and whether to lower the age to 16 / 17, or remove the lower age limit completely. It is important to state here that the lowering of the age is intended to bring within the legislation abuse experienced by teenagers as victims, and comes as a response to reports by groups such as Respect, who have been campaigning hard on the issue of dating violence. Nevertheless, lowering the age would also seem to include the possibility of bringing parent abuse within the definition, a small step towards full recognition.
The arguments about the impact of this have been rehearsed before: the potential effects of criminalising young people, the need to back up law with services, the need to change attitudes as well as the law, as well as the question of whether domestic violence offers the most appropriate framework of understanding. Nevertheless, it remains the case that, for some parents calling the police is a matter of life and death and we should afford them the respect of being able to name the violence for what it is.
The consultation exercise runs till 30th March 2012.
Filed under Discussion
HOLES IN THE WALL 