Author Archives: Hitw Team

by | September 30, 2025 · 8:20 am

Video: 4 ways to stay calm

This video was originally recorded for capafirstresponse.org to add to their library of resources for parents who are experiencing not just CAPVA but generally stresses of day to day life – so we thought they would be beneficial to share on Holes in the wall too.

Staying calm when things aren’t going right is tricky, and even more so when the stressful situation is happening with your child. Esther Jones has shared four ways to keep calm during challenging moments with children, so do watch and try them out when you need them. When we’re able to stay calm and grounded it helps the child to feel safe and trust that things will be okay. It also helps us not to say or do things to make the situation worse.

Find out more about Esther:  https://www.esther-jones.com/ & The Unschool Space on Facebook

Many thanks to Esther for taking the time to share her calming ways with us, we’re very grateful as we know this resource will be beneficial to so many of the parents and carers we work with.

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by | September 5, 2025 · 9:05 am

The importance of support and understanding for adoptive families

‘Adoption is in crisis’ was the headline of one of our recent guest blogposts, but are things getting better? Blogs from Patch, Al Coates, Maude Champagne and even Amity Solutions got us thinking about the importance of support and understanding for adoptive families.

Within the UK, the support offered to families through the lack of clarity, and eventual reduction in funding for the Adoption and special guardianship support fund (ASGSF) has been a topic of significant concern over the past 12 months. This fund was once a lifeline for those living with traumatised children who were often dysregulated, distressed, and/or seeking to control the only thing they could, their adoptive or wider families. Once entitling children to up to £3,000 per year for specialist therapies, this funding has reduced by 40% after months of concerns that it was to be removed altogether. 

The ADGSF is the perfect example of when academia, practice and families come together to create change. Julie Selwyn’s report, ‘Beyond the Adoption Order’ highlighted that parents fearing for their own safety, and the safety of other children in the household was the leading cause of adoption ‘breakdown’; creating a platform for parent-activists to share their experience, and evidence which mobilised (and funded) social work systems to provide the essential support to keep families together and reduce harm. However, what has been clear from our recent blog contributors is how these harms are being experienced by adoptive and kinship parents globally.

Adoption is a rupture for a child, regardless of when it occurs in their life, or how wonderful and informed their adoptive parents may be, many children experience on-going trauma because of this rupture. This means adoptive parents are more likely to experience harm from their child than not (see Al Coates Churchill report).  It is essential that support systems act to ensure parents and wider family members are supported so they can support their child(ren). As highlighted by Maude Champagne, too often guidance around what a family may need are hidden behind the paywalls of academic journals and drowning in academic wording that makes no sense to a practitioner. 

Work such as Maude’s ‘decoding aggression’, and Al’s Churchill Fellowship illuminate the need for robust support systems and, most importantly, understanding. Understanding can come from peers and formal systems of peer support, it can come from professionals who understand the complex neurological, developmental, and environmental interactions that occur to increase vulnerability to this form of harm. Understanding these interactions and needs are often placed under the umbrella of ‘being trauma-informed’, however this is very much a ‘buzz word’ at present. What does being ‘trauma-informed’ actually mean? As Fiona Wells and the Patch Steering group highlight, being trauma-informed is only one part of the parenting and professional journey; support and care must also be trauma responsive and recovery focused (for a full list of their recommendations, see: http://www.ourpatch.org.uk). 

Is adoption in crisis? Yes. The global picture is there are fewer adoptive parents, more children waiting for adoptive parents, and the complexity of needs is increasing, with huge gaps in knowledge and service provision. Are things getting better?  Yes. This arena needs more people and teams like Al, Maude, and Fiona and the Patch group. Our bloggers this series demonstrate how lived experience, alongside research and practise knowledge, can be combined; creating resources and recommendations which could make a genuine impact on their lives of adoptive and special guardian families. 

Nikki Rutter

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by | September 1, 2025 · 12:57 pm

Helen Bonnick Awarded MBE in 2025 King’s New Year Honours

Helen Bonnick, a pioneering voice in the field of child-to-parent abuse and founder of Holes in the Wall has been awarded an MBE in the 2025 King’s New Year Honours for her outstanding services to families 

This recognition marks a significant milestone in her decades-long commitment to raising awareness, supporting affected families, and shaping professional responses to this often-overlooked issue.

Helen is widely known for her work as a social worker, researcher, and advocate. This website, Holes in the Wall, has become an international hub for resources, research, and community support around child and adolescent to parent violence and abuse (CAPVA). Through this platform, she has helped countless families and professionals better understand and respond to the complexities of these behaviours.

In addition to her independent work, Helen serves as the patron of Capa First Response, a community interest company dedicated to supporting families experiencing child-to-parent violence. Her involvement has brought invaluable expertise and visibility to the organisation, helping it grow and reach more families in need.

Reflecting on her award, Helen shares:

“It was an incredible day and a privilege to be able to represent all those working in this field. I was most impressed with the briefing that Princess Anne had been given, allowing some time for a real conversation with her about the issue of blame particularly, as well as the sad fact that families around the whole world seem to suffer similar harm. My family have supported me in this work in countless ways over the last 20 years and so it was lovely that they could be there too.”

Helen’s recognition with an MBE not only honours her personal dedication but also shines a light on the broader issue of CAPVA, encouraging continued dialogue, research, and support for affected families.

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by | July 29, 2025 · 9:12 pm

Why I Wrote “Decoding Aggression, Complex Behaviours, and Brain-Based Disabilities” Maude Champage

As an adoptive parent and as a professional dedicated to supporting children, youth, and their families, I’ve spent years observing a significant gap in how we approach aggression, complex behaviours, and brain-based disabilities. This gap often leaves families feeling isolated, misunderstood, and without the effective, timely support they desperately need. It was this persistent observation, coupled with a deep desire to bridge that divide, that ultimately led me to write my new book, Decoding Aggression, Complex Behaviours, and Brain-Based Disabilities.

My primary motivation for writing this manual was to get the most current and impactful information directly into the hands of the professionals who work with these families every day.

Far too often, groundbreaking research and effective strategies remain confined to academic journals or specialized conferences, taking too long to filter down to the front lines where they can make a real difference. I envisioned a resource that would empower therapists, educators, social workers, medical professionals, and other caregivers with the latest understanding of aggression in children and youth, equipping them with the tools to provide truly effective and timely support.

The title itself, “Decoding Aggression,” speaks to the core of the book’s purpose. Aggression in children and youth is rarely a simple act. It’s often a complex communication, a symptom of underlying challenges, particularly when brain-based disabilities are present (like ADHD, complex developmental trauma, Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder and Autism – to name a few). Without a comprehensive understanding of the neurological, developmental, and environmental factors at play, interventions can be ineffective, leading to frustration for both the child and their family.

But this book isn’t just about understanding the causes of aggression, it’s profoundly about supporting the entire family. When a child exhibits aggression or complex behaviours, the impact ripples through every aspect of family life. Parents often experience immense stress, burnout, and social isolation. Siblings may feel neglected or fearful. The family unit as a whole can struggle to maintain a sense of balance and well-being. This is why a central tenet of Decoding Aggression is the unwavering focus on the well-being of all family members impacted by these issues.

I firmly believe that effective support for the child is inextricably linked to robust support for their family. This means equipping professionals not only with strategies to address the child’s behaviours but also with the knowledge and empathy to support the parents, educate the siblings, and help the family navigate the systemic challenges they face. The book emphasizes a holistic, family-centered approach, recognizing that a child’s progress is often accelerated when their family feels empowered, understood, and adequately resourced.

So, who might benefit most from Decoding Aggression, Complex Behaviours, and Brain-Based Disabilities?

Professionals in a wide array of fields will find this manual invaluable:

· Educators and School Psychologists: To better understand and support students exhibiting aggression in the classroom, develop individualized education plans (IEPs) that are truly effective, and collaborate more effectively with families.

· Therapists (e.g., Psychologists, Social Workers, Occupational Therapists, Speech-Language Pathologists): To deepen their clinical understanding of aggression in the context of various brain-based disabilities, refine their intervention strategies, and provide more comprehensive family-based therapy.

· Medical Professionals (e.g., Pediatricians, Psychiatrists, Neurologists): To gain a more nuanced understanding of the behavioral manifestations of neurological conditions and better guide families towards appropriate support services.

· Social Workers and Child Protection Workers: To enhance their ability to assess complex family dynamics, identify underlying needs, and connect families with appropriate community resources.

· Caregivers and Support Staff in Residential Settings: To implement consistent, informed, and compassionate approaches to managing challenging behaviours in their daily interactions.

Ultimately, I wrote Decoding Aggression, Complex Behaviours, and Brain-Based Disabilities out of a profound commitment to improving the lives of children, youth, and their families. It is my hope that this book will serve as a vital bridge, connecting cutting-edge knowledge with practical application, and empowering professionals to deliver the timely, effective, and truly family-centered support that every family deserves.

I have also dedicated this book to:

All family members who have experienced the worry, shame and isolation of caring for a child who struggles with keeping safe and healthy relationships: you are seen, believed and you are not alone.

Maude

You can find the book on Amazon: https://www.amazon.ca/Decoding-Aggression-Behaviours-Brain-Based-Disabilities/dp/B0F9214CBZ/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1OD69LLLGO2Y6&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.kVPzly11CtfGpuQzdiRElh2vLYHAKMcB_nUlVggLmsbGjHj071QN20LucGBJIEps.zTY5nMhkYFfu5-vaQIkIEVvQ4i4NPpWMZ3ALsIzJGxQ&dib_tag

Find out more about Maude’s work and several resources on her website and social media pages: https://www.maudechampagne.com https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-maude-champagne-363a322ba/

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61575276833045

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by | July 24, 2025 · 8:53 pm

Fellowship Work – Al Coates

The start point is my own home, we’re a family made through fostering and adoption. How that came about is their story but the themes of early adversity, separation and loss, then navigating the care system before being grafted into a home and family are common for the majority of adopted, kinship and fostered children. The impact on them doesn’t require too much imagination or knowledge of child trauma to understand. 

The affect of early life challenges cast a long shadow across my children in different ways. Lots of normal parenting challenges but also meltdowns, dysregulation, shouting, threats, refusal, aggression, destruction, bullying and intimidation became our normal. Behaviour supercharged with, what was often, an intensity and duration far beyond behaviour that parents and carers expect. We found ourselves consumed and exhausted by the challenges, constant accommodation, negotiation, regulation and peacekeeping all the while struggling to keep ourselves sane.  

There was an ebb and flow to our lives, we received support some good and some not so good, it would come and go, interventions and support would run it’s course.We managed at times for a period but then would be drawn into extremes of behaviour that would unravel us all. 

This experience specifically inspired me to consider how services support families made through adoption and kinship arrangements beyond short bursts of intervention. For many families the challenges that they face are enduring and span childhood rather than brief moments in time or developmental phases. This question was the spark for my Fellowship*. 

All this made me question how other countries and contexts supported parents and carers in similar circumstances. I knew, anecdotally, of some services in North America but the nature of the issue means that services supporting families are not always that easy to find. The Fellowship’s purpose is to draw learning from international models and then to see it applied to the UK. 

I decided to undertake my learning online mainly because I didn’t know where to go. The silence around this issue is deafening and having been successful in my application I had a mild panic that I would not be able to identify professionals and services to speak to. I’ll not bore you the trail and where it led me but frequently the key links in the chain were parents and carers who had built on their lived experience to then go on and build, develop or work in services that helped other families. 

Peer support was the cornerstone of so many services that I spoke to (Canada, USA, Republic of Ireland etc.). This was no real surprise, peer support offers specific antidotes to parents and carers who often find themselves isolated both in practical terms due to the physical need to be present with their child and to manage the environment but also the relational isolation that so often occurs. Online communities offer a unique opportunity to connect the caregivers in a way that meets the practical challenges but also the instant and reactive nature of many families’ daily lives. 

Trained and supported peer coordinators/mentors working with clinicians offering interventions to families was a model utilised in Canada. The mentors were able to build onto the connections they had with parents and carers delivered low level but immediate interventions. For example,  writing safey plans, identifying supporters and advocacy with other professionals. Beyond this they understood the clinical interventions being offered and spoke directly to the practitioners delivering them. Carers were supported while they waited for interventions, they were offered support in terms of their own wellbeing and then once the interventions drew to the end they didn’t fall off a cliff edge but remained part of the peer community and if necessary could retain access to the clinicians. 

The benefits of community underpinned by interventions were clear, families spoke of feeling held, understood, supported and validated. They could ‘top up’ their knowledge and seek clarification.   Like all families life would take over, children’s behaviour would ebb and flow but the door remained open with families remaining connected and did not have to start from scratch if they wanted help.  

There was so much more discussed across the conversations I spoke with services in Australia about the model of intervention used for families and with practitioners in the US about respite and the needs of children. There was so many valuable conversations that I decided to release over 20 of the interviews as part of the report as well as the three podcasts that I created with my findings. You can view the report summary and listen to the podcasts here.   

There’s no longer a silence in the UK about challenging, violent and aggressive behaviour in children but there remains no clear consensus on how to help families. My hope is to help move that conversation on. My Churchill Fellowship Report is part of that conversation. I hope people find it at least interesting and at best of value. 

*The Churchill Fellowship is a UK charity which supports individual UK citizens to follow their passion for change, through learning from the world and bringing that knowledge back to the UK. Together the community of Churchill Fellows use their international learning to lead the change they wish to see across every area of UK life. 

60% of adoptive parents say they have experienced violent and aggressive behaviour.  Kinship families are often caring for children with similar biographies that can be compounded by the interfamily challenges and the age and circumstances of the carer. 

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by | June 11, 2025 · 1:10 pm

Is it conflict – or something more? Understanding couple relationship dynamics

As co-founder of We Are Amity CIC, I’m often asked the same question: “Is this parental conflict, or is it something more serious?” When tensions rise at home, it can be hard to distinguish between everyday disagreements and something more harmful. But understanding this difference is vital. It shapes the kind of support we offer, the risks we consider, and the safety we help families create, especially for children. In this article, I explore how to tell the difference between conflict and control and why naming the dynamic matters.

Is it conflict – or something more? Understanding couple relationship dynamics

When tensions between parents rise home, it can be challenging to understand what’s really going on, especially when strong emotions, parenting pressures, or past experiences cloud our judgement.

One of the most common questions families and professionals ask is this:

“Is this conflict between us or is it something more serious, like abuse?”

Understanding the difference isn’t just helpful; it’s essential. It shapes how support is offered, what risks might be present, and how children are protected.

What Is Parental Conflict?

The Department for Work & Pensions released official statistics on the number of children affected by parental conflict in families. The figures showed that 12% of children in couple-parent families had at least one parent who reported ‘relationship distress’ in the 2021 to 2022 survey period. Reducing Parental Conflict – GOV.UK

Parental conflict happens in many families. It often looks like:

  • Heated arguments about parenting, money or other stressors
  • Shouting, blaming or interrupting during disagreements
  • A sense of relationship frustration that builds over time
  • Struggling to resolve everyday arguments

In these relationships, both people usually feel able to voice their views, even if those views aren’t always heard kindly. There’s often mutual stress, shared responsibility, and an underlying desire to resolve things, even if that’s not always successful.

These dynamics can still affect children. Ongoing conflict, especially when it’s loud, unresolved, or frequent, can leave children feeling anxious, caught in the middle, or unsure how to express their emotions. We know this impacts their ability to sleep, do well at school and their emotional outcomes. But crucially, there is usually no ongoing fear or deliberate control in these situations.

Example: A separated couple frequently argue over contact arrangements or money. They both express anger, and communication often breaks down, but neither tries to control the other. Both want to find a way forward, even if they’re stuck on how.

What is domestic abuse?

Domestic abuse is different. It’s not about two people disagreeing. It’s a pattern where one person holds power over the other, using fear, control, and manipulation to maintain that imbalance.

It can show up as:

  • One person constantly feeling afraid to speak or act freely
  • Monitoring phone use, whereabouts, or who someone sees
  • Using finances or children to control or punish
  • Belittling, gaslighting, or turning others against a partner
  • Physical or sexual intimidation, threats, or harm

Unlike parental conflict, abuse often means one person changes their behaviour to keep the peace, while the other’s behaviour goes unchecked. Children in these families may hide their feelings, act as ‘protectors’, or mimic controlling behaviours.

Example: A parent hesitates to speak during meetings because they fear the repercussions at home. They avoid seeking support, knowing their partner reads all messages and accuses them of betrayal. The children speak in whispers, describing the atmosphere as “walking on eggshells.”

Why the lines feel blurry

It feels blurry because there are behaviours in relationships featuring parental conflict as well as abusive ones. Examples of behaviours in both types of relationships can include shouting, swearing, disagreeing, blaming, silence and withdrawal, non-physical and aggression. What matters is the context and intention.

Families don’t always use the word “abuse.” Instead, they say:

  • “We’re just not good at communicating.”
  • “We both have a temper.”
  • “It’s been like this for so long… I don’t even know what’s normal anymore.”

There are reasons people struggle to name what’s happening:

  • It’s become ‘normal’: When someone grows up around control or shouting, they might not see it as unusual.
  • Fear and shame: Admitting abuse can feel like admitting failure, or risking further harm.
  • Control isn’t always obvious: It can be silent, slow-building, and invisible to outsiders.
  • People fight back: Sometimes a non-abusive person may shout or react, leading to confusion about who’s to blame.’

But the key question is this…Does one person consistently feel unsafe, unheard, or unable to live freely?

That’s the difference between conflict and control.

Spotting the signs

Here are some signs that point to unhealthy and potentially abusive dynamics:

  • One person walks on eggshells; the other dominates.
  • Someone changes their behaviour out of fear, not respect.
  • Arguments end when one person gives in, not because a compromise is reached.
  • There’s constant emotional pressure, threats, or manipulation.
  • Children take on adult roles, become anxious, or withdraw.

In contrast, conflict, though uncomfortable, usually allows for mutual input, personal freedom, and emotional repair.

What families and practitioners can do

It’s important not to rush and ‘label’ but not dismiss concerns.

Ask:

  • Does each person feel emotionally and physically safe?
  • Can both people express themselves without fear?
  • Are children thriving or treading carefully?
  • Is there a pattern of control, isolation, or fear?

Whether you’re a family member, friend, or professional, your role isn’t to judge but to listen, notice patterns, and create space for change. That might mean conflict resolution support, therapeutic intervention, or, in some cases, safety planning and protective action.

Final thoughts

Conflict and abuse are not the same, but both affect families deeply, especially children. Understanding differences allows for better support, clearer choices, and safer outcomes.

When we stop asking “Who started it?” and start asking “Who has the power?” we begin to see the dynamics more clearly. For some couples, a relationship breakdown is inevitable, and the conflict is often part of that breakdown. For others who want help and stay together, the right support can be transformative.  But for those who are experiencing abuse, understanding the early recognition of abusive dynamics can be lifesaving.

Emily Nickson Williams is the co-founder of We Are Amity CIC www.weareamity.co.uk

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by | April 4, 2025 · 7:00 pm

Adoption is in crisis — and change is no longer optional | Fiona Wells | The PATCH Steering Group

 

Adoption is in crisis — and change is no longer optional.

We’ve created a full report and an executive summary, both of which include the Impact Pathway — a resource designed to support more effective, trauma-responsive and recovery-focused planning and intervention.

  • PATCH Pathway: Adoption Crisis Brought Into Focus

A comprehensive exploration of what’s going wrong — and what needs to change. It captures the voices of adopters, insights from experts, and the reality of lived experience.

  • PATCH Pathway: Executive Summary

A concise overview for time-pressed professionals. It lays out the key challenges and introduces ideas for real, preventative change.

  • PATCH Impact Pathway: Prevention in Practice (this is highlight in full in both documents above)

A practical approach to ensure support before breakdown — for families, carers, and systems alike.

The truth is simple: we are failing families. Trauma is being ignored. Systems designed to protect are instead contributing to breakdown — and the cost is paid by children, families, society, and the future of social care itself.

If you’re a professional, you already know: recruitment is low, disruptions are rising, and families are breaking down. You know change is needed.

I write to you as an adoptee, an adopter, a social worker, and the founder of PATCH. This work is born from personal experience and professional commitment. It doesn’t claim to have all the answers — but it’s a start. A conversation. A catalyst.

At its core is a simple message: if we don’t change how we treat adopters and foster carers, we won’t have any. And if we don’t support caregivers, parents, and families — we are not supporting children.

One cannot be done without the other.

We invite you to read, reflect, and join us in driving the change that children and families urgently need.

Warmly,

  Fiona Wells 

& The PATCH Steering Group

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by | March 25, 2025 · 9:38 am

BBC Highlights Urgent Need for Support on Child Violence Against Parents

The BBC has recently been working with families across the North East of England to explore their experiences of ‘child violence against parent’, raising awareness of the postcode lottery and parent blame impacting parent and their children: Child violence against parents: Victims plead for support – BBC News

BBC Politics North highlighted this in their segment on the 16th of March, speaking to Durham County Council’s Jackie Staff, Durham Police and Crime Commissioner Joy Allen, parents and social workers in the North East, and our own Dr Nikki Rutter from Durham University. You can see this on BBC Iplayer: Politics North (North East and Cumbria) – 16/03/2025 – BBC iPlayer

The Anna Foster show at BBC Newcastle also welcomed Dr Nikki Rutter on the 17th of March to speak more about some of the real challenges facing families living with this form of harm. Holes in The Wall was mentioned as a resource. You can access this until the 15th April 2025 via BBC Sounds: Anna Foster – 17/03/2025 – BBC Sounds

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by | March 15, 2025 · 10:11 am

The Guardian Highlights the Reality of CAPVA—And Why It Needs More Attention

It was great to see us included in this piece in the Guardian by Moya Crockett: ‘My child would use anything as a weapon’: the parents who live in fear of their offspring | Parents and parenting | The Guardian

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by | January 22, 2025 · 12:11 pm

Norfolk PCC : Pilot to help vulnerable young people will provide a lasting legacy

A pilot to provide specialist support to families affected by child to parent abuse has been celebrating its positive outcomes.

The pilot has already offered support to 81 children and young people and their families.

Over 70 practitioners across Norfolk Children’s Services, Norfolk Youth Justice, NIDAS and some Norfolk schools have been trained to deliver Respect’s accredited intervention ‘The Respect Young Peoples Programme’ also known as the RYPP. The intervention is for families where children or young people aged 8-18 are displaying repeated abusive and harmful behaviour towards their parent or caregivers (including stepparents, adoptive parents, foster carers and kinship carers). This abuse can be physical, verbal, emotional, psychological, sexual, financial, damage to property, coercive and controlling.

Norfolk’s Police and Crime Commissioner, Sarah Taylor, said: “Thanks to funding from the Home Office’s Perpetrator Fund, this pilot has given us a rare opportunity to work closely with families experiencing child- and adolescent-to-parent violence and abuse. Some families experiencing this type of violence or abuse have said that they feel stuck between a rock and a hard place as they don’t necessarily know how to best cope with the situation but don’t want to get the police involved. By working with other organisations including NCC’s Children’s Services, Youth Justice and NIDAS, this project has worked with families to help transform the support available, which in turn has helped them navigate these difficulties.

“Early findings show this work had had a profoundly positive effect on families involved, with a reduction in the need to involve the police or other services in interventions.”

“This joined up approach represents true partnership working. The Child and Adolescent to Parent Violence and Abuse (CAPVA) project has been overseen by my office and delivered in partnership with Respect, Norfolk Constabulary, Norfolk Integrated Domestic Abuse Service (NIDAS), Youth Justice, Norfolk Children’s Services and Brave Futures. 

“As part of the project, NIDAS recruited two full time CAPVA advocates, a UK first, and Brave Futures provided therapeutic support for young people who require extra support prior to engaging in the RYPP. I am delighted that this project has trained 72 practitioners to deliver the RYPP directly to families and the work by these practitioners will provide a lasting legacy.”

Justine Dodds, Head of Respect Young People’s Service, said: “The Respect Young People’s Service (RYPS) has been delighted to work with the Norfolk Police and Crime Commissioner this year and last. The programme has two dedicated Children and Adolescent to Parent Violence and Abuse (CAPVA) workers whose only role is to work with families on this specific type of abuse.

“This is the first time the Respect Young Peoples Service has trained staff in schools. This has been very exciting, with the potential to reach families before they hit crisis point and are forced to contact statutory services.

“The awareness raising work that we have delivered across children’s services and police is helping to improve understanding and empathy, and to identify what is often a ‘hidden harm’. 

“We want to champion our partners and the people that we have trained so far. This programme has the potential to be truly transformational and preventative by stopping CAPVA, before it starts.”

The Respect Young People’s Programme – how does it work?

The Respect Young People’s Programme (RYPP) is voluntary, and both the young person and their parent/guardian must consent to take part and be willing to engage. The programme avoids blame and works together with both the parents/carers and young person, seeing them all as part of the solution. The programme is designed to enable families to identify negative behaviour patterns and work towards positive outcomes.

RYPP practitioners provide support, insight, and simple solutions to help to improve family relationships via weekly structured sessions and takes approximately three or more months to complete. Sessions are varied and use a variety of creative tools and techniques, underpinned by theoretical models – primarily social learning theory, cognitive behavioural approaches, restorative justice, and conflict resolution.

One RYPP practitioner supporting their client said:

“The family engaged well throughout and really took on board everything within the sessions. I feel very proud of how far they’ve come and the improvement in their relationship and conflict resolution.

“The positive change in behaviour and reduction in aggressive, violent and or abusive behaviour has been wonderful to witness and reinforces my belief in the programme.”

Therapeutic support for children and young people

As part of the CAPVA Project, therapeutic support is provided to children and young people via a new service known as Changing Futures. Delivered by Brave Futures, a spokesperson explained the benefits: “Changing Futures provides a safe environment where children and young people can explore their emotions, gain deeper insight into their behaviours, and minimise their impact on others. Our support encourages self-regulation and equips them with healthy coping strategies to better manage their future. We are already witnessing the positive effects of this therapeutic approach, as children and young people are building trust, applying strategies learned in sessions, and showing improved engagement with education and employment.”

Families have their say

One young person after taking part in the Respect Young People’s Programme said: “It’s 100% helped me and mum and we have conversations every day.  It’s not just helped me but it’s helped my whole family.  We’re much happier now.” 

Parents have fed back on how the programme has improved family life. One parent said: “It has been really helpful. My child has taken some tips from it and has been taking some things in and has been thinking a little bit before they act.”

Another parent said: “It is the first time in four years I have felt we have a worker who understands the issues, listens and affirms, and is able to come up with effective and positive interventions and it has been a completely invaluable experience which we will continue to benefit from. We’ve loved working with our RYPP worker.

Early findings from the pilot have shown that all RYPP practitioners have reported a reduction in violence and abuse for the families that have completed the programme.

*After completing the programme, 93% of parent/carers surveyed said it had helped to improve their relationship with their child. A resounding 100% of their children said that it had helped to improve their relationship with their parent/caregiver.

For more information about The CAPVA project

In March 2024, partners, practitioners, and academic experts came together to discuss best practice and to share academic research at The Nest in Norwich.  The day’s conference provided an opportunity for services across Norfolk to raise awareness of CAPVA, to network and to shine a light on the great work already achieved.

*Data collated as of 8 November 2024.

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