Tag Archives: Parent abuse

Dangerous Child

Part of the Infinity True Stories series, Certificate 15, 2001 Hearst Entertainment Ltd

Starring Delta Burke as Sally Cambridge, and Ryan Merriman as her 16-year-old son, Jack.

“She always protected her son. Now she must protect herself … from him”

I bought this DVD a while ago, but only recently got around to viewing it. More fool me!

Sally has been caring for her two sons by herself after their father left her. There are no surprises how this works out as the film opens with the younger child being rushed to hospital in a critical state. What we are then treated to is a clever and accurate portrayal of life with an abusive son, as we see Jack’s mother battling to come to terms with the fact that her troubled teenage boy is not the beautiful baby she remembers him to have been. Continue reading

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Resolving child to parent violence requires an assertive, intensive and persistent approach.

When we think about work with child to parent violence, the agencies which typically come to mind, and indeed the ones that have attracted the most debate in terms of service provision, would be the police, domestic violence bodies, children’s services, youth offending, health or perhaps schools. While the work of academics such as Judy Nixon, examining the impact of intensive family support, drew attention to parent abuse as part of the bigger picture of disruptive and dysfunctional family life, there has not been the focus on housing support that might have been warranted. So it was very interesting to make contact with the Family Support Project workers from Wolverhampton Homes Housing Inclusion Team, as a result of the recent conference in Nottingham, and to explore with them the work that they do in this field. Continue reading

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“An alignment of the planets”

Returning to the topic of themes that emerged from the recent conference on domestic violence by children against parents, in Nottingham, I’d like to look at 2 more ideas that caught my attention.

Launching the conference, Jo Sharpen, from AVA,  described it as very timely, and indeed, throughout the day, speakers referred to a series of events that support our focus on the issue of child to parent violence at this time. The changed definition of domestic violence in England and Wales (with the publication of the Home Office Guidance to which AVA contributed), was highlighted and declared helpful in recognising that under 18s could be abusive, though bringing parent abuse within the domestic violence umbrella was also considered problematic, because of the important differences between CPV and IPV and the potential criminalisation of young people (see my earlier post for more details). March also saw the publication of the UK Government Action Plan: A call to end violence against women and girls, and the launch of the EVAWGUK policy. Though parent abuse is sadly still not specifically mentioned, it does offer opportunities to discuss the issue more widely. Continue reading

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“Once your awareness is raised, doing nothing is not an option”.

Picking up on a phrase from Jenny Bright in the last post, it has seemed that almost everyone I have spoken with recently has described the point at which they learned about parent abuse as an epiphany. It was, after all, the reason I have given for setting up this site. Each of us responds to that experience in our own way, whether by further study, setting up local provision, or even running a blog; but many describe the need to “raise awareness”. It got me wondering what we actually mean by that phrase. Continue reading

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Emerging themes 1: CPV and IPV

In my last post I referred to the emergence of a number of themes through the day as we met last week in Nottingham. I want to return to one of these now, namely the issues around conceptualising child to parent violence as domestic violence.

This is something that has been covered by a number of people in the past (e.g. Holt or Hunter, Nixon and Parr), but it keeps re-emerging for a number of reasons. Firstly, much of the work being developed in Britain at the moment is taking place within agencies also dealing with adult intimate partner violence, forcing the issue as adjustments are made to approaches or expectations. Secondly, the change in definition of domestic violence within Britain to include perpetrators aged 16 upwards, has been hailed by some as a positive move, allowing the open discussion of the topic in a new way, and the recognition within policy of the reality of parent abuse. Continue reading

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Job done?

So the last few weeks have been pretty hectic following the announcement on February 26th, of the grant awarded to the University of Brighton for research into child to parent violence. The significant media interest in the issue of child to parent violence mirrors what was seen in Melbourne, following the announcement there of the development of the Keeping Families Safe project. It seems likely that there will be further coverage in national papers, local radio, women’s magazines and perhaps even television in the near future. With the conference coming up in Nottingham this week, which will include a presentation of interim findings from the work being undertaken at Oxford University by Rachel Condry and Caroline Miles, it is an exciting time to be involved in the raising of awareness or indeed in the implementation of work with families experiencing this type of abuse. Continue reading

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Something else to worry about!

There are a lot of reasons why we might be anxious about the influence of Disney in the children’s clothes and games markets. We might justifiably be concerned about the effects on young people of so much time spent in front of a screen. But I’m not quite ready to include an inevitable slide towards parent abuse among my reasons!

Not having a subscription to the Times newspaper, I bought a real, paper copy last Thursday, 28th February, in order to see the write up of the grant awarded to the University of Brighton for their CPV research. The half column write up on page 5 told me only what I knew already, but I was attracted to an article in Times2 by Helen Rumbelow, and extracts from a book by Sue Palmer, under the headline, Unhappy Daughters: how we are raising a troubled generation. Continue reading

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Don’t forget those working one to one!

I posted earlier in the week the details of some training coming up in the UK in April. “Crossing the Line, Working with Teen to Parent Abuse” is a three day training course for practitioners wishing to develop understanding and processes – as well as specific  resources – for work in both group and one-to-one situations. On the Events and Training page you can find full details of the course, testimonials and biographies for the two trainers delivering the event, as well as booking forms. Continue reading

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Child to Parent Violence Webinar

Parenting UK, part of the charity, Family Lives, holds regular events to support practitioners, including, recently, a webinar on the subject of Child to Parent Violence, presented by Oliver Standing, Policy and Projects Co-ordinator from  Adfam, and Sara Hassell, a Family Co-ordinator with Family Lives. Oliver was talking about a recent research project. Sara was addressing work she does in a primary school and the tools she uses working to support abused parents. The organisers have made a video of the presentation available to all interested parties (which lasts just under an hour and three quarters), and also links to documents mentioned and to supplementary material. Continue reading

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Silent Suffering

I have mentioned previously the hub page: The silent suffering of parent abuse when children abuse parents. This was started around 3 years ago by Lou Purplefairy and includes information about how to recognise parent abuse, suggestions of where to go for help and an empassioned plea  for greater recognition and support for parents. There are over 100 comments on the thread, some from parents describing their experiences and others offering advice and support.

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